Take this simple multiple-choice quiz and save yourself some embarrassment!
1 How long is your drummer’s solo?
a) He doesn’t get one.
b) A couple minutes is all, and it’s very funky.
c) Which of our drummers are you talking about?
2 What is the secret of your success?
a) Inspiration.
b) Perspiration.
c) Butchering old soul classics in a manner beloved by middle-aged housewives and the mentally unwell.
3 How many times has your band’s lineup changed?
a) Never happened, dude. If anyone left, it just wouldn’t be the same.
b) A few. It’s so hard to find a good accordionist.
c) 1,179.
4 The name of your band is…
a) A favorite phrase from a William S. Burroughs novel.
b) An action verb, followed by an even number.
c) Indistinguishable from that of an accounting firm.
5 What is your favorite subject matter for lyrics?
a) The pain of loving.
b) The joy of drinking.
c) Dragons. Or dungeons. But mostly dragons.
IF YOU ANSWERED…
Mostly a): Congratulations! You’re in a good band.
Mostly b): Commiserations! You’re in a not-very-good band.
Mostly c): What’s that sucking sound? Oh, it’s you.
by CLARK COLLIS www.blender.com
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